5: “You need to change outside as well as inside – if you want your ex back”

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Did your ex ever notice when you had a haircut or changed your nail colour?

Most men don’t.
They don’t see what we see.

After my ex left me, I had more spare time on my hands. I started to analyse why he left me and googled “how to make him love me again” kind of thing.
I’ve learnt more about male psychology while being single than while being in a relationship.

You may have heard this before; that men have different folders on every ex in their memory.
Women have only one folder for their partners. This means when a woman has a new partner, it overrides the folder, so often past memories or even their ex’s existence will be deleted from memory. Awesome if you don’t want to remember bad memories, right?
Usually men tend to forget about the bad memories with time and the good memories stay in their folder.

Anyway, if you are wanting your ex back, you really need to almost become a new person in his brain folder.
Remember when I explained to you if a man has just left his partner, he creates a mental list of their faults? That’s why.
You need to make some changes if you really want an ex back. Personality (inside) changes are important, but hard to see.
The good news is that with your look (outside), people can see changes instantly.

One thing we have to remember is men don’t notice the little things.
So you think, I need a change, I’ll get a haircut. But if you take off 5cm of your hair, do you think your ex would notice though? Probably not.
Ok – I will get all my hair off. Wait, does your ex like long hair or short hair?
You will have to consider what they are attracted to (if you want them back).
Unfortunately, men often fall in love with their eyes.

Imagine, in a few months’ time, you look fabulous than ever with your new hairdo, make up and whatever you did.
Thanks to social media, your ex will definitely notice that you have changed. What you do next is up to you.
Next up – 3 weeks VS a month after my ex left me. What changed?

You can read Yuki’s other dating stories on this journal:

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